Pregnant with #2!

The day after my last post, I found out I was pregnant!  I was not expecting it - it was only our second month trying, and we weren't even using any medications this time!  Quite different than ttc with #1.  When I mentioned to my doc how much easier it was getting pregnant the second time, he referenced that common saying, once you've been pregnant, your body knows what to do, or something like that.

 I will share with everyone that the main thing that helped me get pregnant so easily - is eating meat.  I really believe it.  The entire time we ttc'd for #1, I was vegetarian.  The month we got pregnant with #1, I had started eating meat that month.  I've been eating meat ever since.  It changed my cycles so that they are regular and normal.  I had thought they were before, at least for me, but now it is even more so.  Yes, changing my diet actually changed the length of my cycles, and also the day I ovulated.  When I was vegetarian, I ovulated on CD 24.  As a meat eater, I ovulate on CD 15.

I am now 14 weeks along.  Things are going well, and this pregnancy is exactly like my first one, same symptoms at the same times.  Psychologically, it feels different being pregnant with your second.  We feel much more casual and confidant about things, we know what to expect, it is like we are pros already.  Of course, having a toddler at home really changes the dynamics.  I can't rest like I would want, and so I am back to napping when she naps.  So I'm really not getting much done these days.  Also, since she has started daycare a few days a week (I'm working part-time now, yay!), she is "immune building."  The pediatrician put it best, "7-10 days of illness, followed by 3-5 days of wellness."  Yup!!  So, she and I have been sick fairly continuously for the past 3 months.  Because she is about 2 days ahead of me, so as she gets well, I'm on the tail end of my illness, and as I'm getting well, she is getting sick again.  Yup.  That hasn't been fun.  There were weeks I never saw the sun.  One highlight (tongue-in-cheek, here), was when we both had the stomach flu, either rotavirus or norovirus, and we both were violently vomiting in the car during a recent road trip (my poor husband).  Something we never want to experience again.  At least we didn't have the flu this year, we both had our flu shots.  I thought I was having some different pregnancy symptoms this time around, and had told the doctor that in this pregnancy, unlike my first one, I am ravenously hungry all the time, and also freezing cold all the time.  He shot me down when he said, "dear, that's not the pregnancy, that's you."  He went on to explain that since I am "running after a toddler all day," that is my body requiring the calories to keep up with her.

We told our families by putting a t-shirt on our daughter which read, "I'm going to be a big sister."  Some family members immediately got it, and others were much slower.  If we have another girl, we wouldn't have to do much except pick out a name and decorate the nursery.  If we have a boy, we would do the above, and also get boy clothes.  Prep is much easier with my second since I've already done all the research, selected neutral baby gear, etc.  They will be almost exactly 3 years apart.

The only other significant thing, is that my 2.5 year old daughter is already big-time bonded with "baby #2."  My husband and I cautiously understand anything can happen, but she does not know that and has not held back at all.  She talks to my belly every day, shows it things, kisses, pets, cuddles, hugs, you name it.  It is immensely cute and melts my heart.  I understand what "multiplying joy" means now.  Not only was I joyful about being pregnant, but my daughter is joyful too, and when I see and share in her joy, it makes me even happier.

TTC methods for #2

I am using the Fertility Awareness Method, focusing on primary fertility signs of basal body temp and cervical mucous.  I generally have egg-white cervical mucous, EWCM, for 3 days and ovulate on the third day.  Along the way, I've learned my other signs of ovulation: including a high energy day right before ovulation, changes in libido, changes in wanting to look prettier/dressier around ovulation, and usually ovulation pains the day of ovulation.  I can even tell which ovary I ovulate from.  My ovaries tend to take turns each month, and I've always thought my right ovary was the better one, that was the one I had ovulated from when I got pregnant with DD.  If you had asked me prior to TTC if I ever had ovulation pains or could detect ovulation without an OPK, I would have said, "no!  what are you talking about?!" 

And with temping, I am fortunate enough to have an ovulation dip on the day of ovulation.  Temping is my favorite.  It tells me: the day I'm going to ovulate, if I've ovulated (which OPKs do not), when I have an estrogen surge (changes in hormones) after ovulation, when it is looking good or not for pregnancy, and if I'll probably be getting my period soon.  It gives new meaning to having your "hopes up," as long as the temps are up!  Whenever someone signs up for fertility friend through my page, it gives me 5 free VIP days.  This has happened twice recently, so I really appreciate it!  If you sign up, please do so through mine or someone else's page.  Thank you!!

Since we have a girl, and would be interested in having a boy (of course, we would be thrilled with either, and the most important thing is having a healthy child) we are very casually trying the Shettles method for gender selection (I haven't read the book).  This involves timing bd close to ovulation, and even changing the Ph balance in the reproductive tract, via diet, etc.  So I've been eating more bananas and drinking more orange juice.  Interesting to note that everyone on both sides of our family has had a girl first, and then if someone has a second child, it is a boy.

How else is TTC different with #2?  Of course, there is less time and less energy to give to TTC, already having a young child.  I suppose there is a little less urgency or pressure.  There is some familiarity with ttc and what worked previously.  However, it also really messed with my head the first month ttc, because I was having all the same symptoms I had when I was pregnant, and I swore I was pregnant!  It just goes to show, there is really no way to know if one is pregnant during the two-week wait, even with prior pregnancy experience!!

Coincidentally, the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays fell during my two-week wait.  Holiday cocktails were offered to me, of which I drank a little bit.  We were also out of town around the time I was expecting to test or get AF for both holidays, a little odd but not so bad.

Reflexology

Natural aging and having a baby have changed my body and health, I feel different. So, I had been thinking about getting a check-up.  I was fortunate enough to happen upon a coincidental and unsolicited word of mouth referral, to a real Chinese doctor, and one to whom Western doctors refer their patients.  He does not advertise, he does not need to.  He has clients from all over the country come to him.

Reflexology is very similiar to acupuncture, and associated with (TCM) Traditional Chinese Medicine. The feet, hands or head can be worked. Most of what you will see about reflexology on the internet says "it is not diagnostic," there are a lot of non-medical people getting certified, they will just give you a foot massage and address some pressure points.  This doctor, however, did do a diagnostic for the first session.

He was great!!  He asked for no information over the phone or prior to the session except for demographics and referral source.  So the only clinical info he knew about me was my age, and obviously, that I'm female.

He went through each pressure point on my foot, and a few around the foot, with either his hands or a wooden massage tool, and small dab of lotion, and told me accurately about each system in my body!!!  I gave him my left foot first, but could just as easily have given my right. He had not specified.

When he activated the pressure points, it was obvious if I felt nothing, if I "could feel it a little," or it was painful.  He was tremendously reassuring during the session.  He pressed several points to begin, and then in his thick Chinese accent, "Ahhh, good news.  Your heart is fine, it is soft (meaning arteries not hardened), strong."  The next point was the adrenals, and boy, was that painful!  "Don't worry," he said smiling, "most people this hurts them, it means stress, you are stressed."  Other systems that were good: immune system, kidneys, lungs, brain, eyes, muscles, joints, intestines, thyroid.  He could tell that I've been having problems with insomnia.  I don't usually have insomnia, but had been for weeks prior to the appointment!!  He noted I had some very mild allergies/sinus problems.  True.  He noted there was something mild with my ear, either some small hearing loss or inner ear problems - true again.  He also noted something about headaches.  I don't usually get them, and I actually told him "no," that "wasn't correct."  But in the days that followed, I realized he had been right!  I had thought they were dehydration headaches, and had dismissed them.  I don't remember if he told me what was causing them, probably not, since I denied having them.  He noted there were some very minor changes to my Pituitary gland after having a baby.  He also noted I had some very small fibroids in my uterus and my breasts, "no serious problem, no cancer.  uterus is okay."  He noted my outer hips were fine, but my inner hips were a little off, also stated that is normal after childbirth.  I asked him if he thought I would have any problems getting pregnant again, or if stress would be a problem for me.  He indicated there shouldn't be any problems with that.  Although, he could work with me on it if I wanted.

He didn't go through the other foot like the first one, instead used it to double check/confirm what the first foot had told him. 

Overall, I felt reassured that I am still healthy.  He would have encouraged me to come back if I needed it, but instead he offered, "you don't need to come back.  but you call me, if you want to come back."

In the days that followed, I felt energized, happy, and relieved.  I started going to bed earlier and doing relaxation techniques every day.  Partly because I had wanted to make these changes, and partly attributable to the reflexology itself.  It marked a transition from an unhealthy lifestyle to a healthier one.   
Bottom line: Reflexology has my hearty endorsement!

Thinking about #2

 Hello everyone, I'm back!  So happy that I have more followers with whom to share this journey.  I hope everyone gets their BFPs soon!

We plan to start trying for #2 soon.  Our daughter recently turned 2 (she is awesome!).  Now that the production of her birthday party is past, I can hopefully turn my focus more to ttc. 

Let me catch you up, in a nutshell:

• I loved being pregnant (and I miss it).
• had the best possible labor and delivery (6 hours of labor and no epidural).
• breastfeeding was harder than childbirth and didn't work out, I realized too late that I was not drinking enough water- DUH!  I have a lot of regrets with this and yearn to get another chance to get it right. 
• Returning to work and juggling work with motherhood has probably been the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, still struggling.  In my experience, there is no way to be a full-time working parent of a young child, and "have it all" - something is always getting shortchanged, and you just constantly juggle what you focus on and what you drop.  The opportunities for guilt are endless.  There is truly not enough time in the day.  I've already dropped the ball in multiple areas of my life and I am not healthy like I was prior to having a child.  How does TTC and a pregnancy possibly fit into my life now?  This has been a barrier to trying for #2- lack of time, lack of energy, and poorer health. As you can imagine, I won't be blogging as much or as involved this time around, because there is just not the time for it- wish there was.  
• I started hinting at wanting #2 around the time my daughter was turning 1, and it took my husband until just recently (the better part of a year, after having called for a moratorium on the subject) to agree to try for #2.  And it took a lot of convincing!
• I am now in my mid-30's.

Also this time around, I'll be approaching TTC differently.  (1)  No longer vegetarian and no clomid.  One thing that has happened is I haven't been vegetarian since getting pregnant with my daughter.  And eating meat has shortened my cycles from an average of 36+ days down to 32 days.  I am also ovulating mid-cycle, this is much improved from the last time we TTC'd.  So, I am hoping to get pregnant without clomid, and willing to try it without clomid.  By the way, clomid did get us pregnant with twins, or at least two gestational sacs.  We found out at 5 months there was a second sac with nothing in it or it was a cyst, and by the end of the pregnancy it had reabsorbed and was gone, thus confirming it had been a sac.  So we don't want to get pregnant with twins (again) if we can help it.  (2)  No OPKs necessary.   I learned so much during the last TTC, I can tell when I ovulate based on body signs, and will not need to use OPKs.  I think I might still temp because I enjoyed it, it is so easy, and it does give helpful info.   (3)  I need daily stress management during TTC AND pregnancy.  Coincidence that I got pregnant the month I did stress management/relaxation every day?  During pregnancy I ended up having an "irritable uterus" and going into preterm labor (fortunately we stopped it and I went full-term), but in retrospect, I believe this was all stress-related.  So, I plan to do daily relaxation during TTC and pregnancy.  I am nervous about going into preterm labor again, and will still need to talk to my obgyn to see if she has any suggestions.  When I was pregnant, I needed a fair amount of bed rest because whenever I stood up from around 25 weeks on, I had contractions.  We have an active toddler who demands all my time and attention, plus she constantly wants me to pick her up, and she uses my body like a jungle gym.  So, I worry about being pregnant with a toddler. 

You can see we will still have challenges, and challenges unique to #2.  Please wish us luck.  Let me know if you have any questions or any requests for blog post topics to consider, thanks!

To be continued... (someday)

We now have a beautiful 5 month old daughter!! It is so worth it!

I do plan to return to this blog in the future (if/when we ttc again).

Thanks, again, for your support. Feel free to comment at any time, I still receive notification so I can respond. Best wishes to all you ttc'ers!

Kim :)

BFP! 2WW details

Here's a very detailed account of my BFP cycle and symptoms:

Follicular phase:
This cycle, #8, I forgot to start my clomid on CD 3. I awoke at 3AM that night, (technically CD 4), and took it. I only had mild hotflashes and vivid dreams for two days the week after finishing the clomid doses. This month, instead of having ovarian pains all month until ovulation, I had breast tenderness the whole week before O, which is unusual for me, that was certainly the clomid.

Luteal phase:
I became tired in the days that followed ovulation, 1 and 2 DPO, a sure sign of rising progesterone, and my temps were shooting through the roof.

My first suspicious symptoms began at 5 DPO, breast tenderness and constipation, that day only.

At 6 DPO I believe I had my 2nd estrogen surge, evidenced by a drop in my temps, feeling colder, continued creamy CM, and poor sleep.

The nights of 6, 7 and 9 DPO, I suffered with insomnia. I had never paid enough attention to really know if this was a part of my monthly cycle or not, although I don't usually get insomnia like that. In fact, I believed the insomnia was a sign I was not pregnant because my progesterone levels must have dropped in order for me not to be tired. I awoke all through the night. Early morning of 7 DPO, like 2AM, I awoke and felt extreme nausea, like I was going to hurl at any minute, then my sense of smell became extremely sensitive and I could smell the food on my cat's breath from several feet away! My cat then cuddled with me and his normal cat smell was very strong. Another night I was literally awake from 2AM onwards. That was honestly a horrible night for me because I could not turn off my mind, and I didn't think I was pregnant, so I was having all these depressing thoughts about what if I never get pregnant, and I was literally pleading with God to help me get pregnant, after my husband got up, I cried in bed.

This 2WW I had nasal stuffiness the whole time, and the second week it seemed to progress into a strange "cold," but I didn't feel bad. At 10 and 11 DPO I started sneezing, coughing, and blowing my nose all the time. I don't usually get sick, so that made me suspicious.

My CM was creamy almost the whole 2WW, beginning at 4 DPO, but that is fairly usual for me. Apparently that is a very common pregnancy symptom.

I was also feeling hot most of the 2WW, and noticed my face was flushed, particularly very pink cheeks starting around 9-10 DPO.

I got a mild acne breakout at 10 DPO.

I became emotional starting at 11 DPO and that continues.

I also had very very mild nausea and headache the entire 2WW, I would rate them a 1/10, at the most 2/10, so I couldn't be sure if that was what I was even feeling.

I might have had some abdominal sensations, but they were so non-descript and fleeting that I never took note of them. I did have some ovarian sensations, but also never noted when those occurred.

I took an HPT at 12 DPO with FMU, and got a very very very faint second line. The control line showed up immediately, very dark, so I almost threw the test away, thinking, "it's negative, it's too early to test." I'm so glad I watched it because within a few minutes (within the reaction time) I could begin to discern something and tried to figure out if it was an evap line or my eyes playing tricks on me.

Another HPT at 13 DPO with FMU was faintly positive, darker than the previous test. Yay! This is the first time I've ever had two positive tests!

At 14 DPO with FMU I took a Fact Plus test, when it is positive it will show a "plus" sign. I figured this would be easier for people to read when I tell them. Pictured below are the three tests, the result lines dried darker on the top two, and lighter on the plus test.


This 2WW I did not feel like I did when I had the chemical. I did not have any belly-button sensations at 7 DPO, or twinges all around my abdomen, or even allow myself to "feel" pregnant. I knew the clomid would make me think I was pregnant, so every symptom I got I attributed to clomid. I would get suspicious and think maybe I was pregnant, but I was also telling myself I wasn't just as much if not more so! In a weird way, I think that helped me to relax. I refused to get my hopes up and tried to go about my daily business as best I could.

Although I will say that entering my data into Fertility Friend every day was like a rollercoaster. Temps would go up, my mood would go up, temps down, mood down. And this being my first month of using the website I had the free, initial, VIP status. They have this application called the "Pregnancy Monitor," and a section in it called "Early Pregnancy Signs." Early Pregnancy Signs is on a scale from 0-100 points, the more points, the more likely you are to be pregnant. Those points would rise and fall throughout my 2WW, and that would get my hopes up as the points rose, and hopes down as the points fell. There is an "Intercourse Timing Analyzer" which rated us "High" this month. I also used the VIP Questions Board. I got an in-depth reply from a real woman within a few hours of posting my chart and my questions, she gave me such helpful feedback!! I love VIP status and could see it being very helpful each cycle, and would highly recommend getting it at least for a few cycles, because the information they give is priceless!
Link to my BFP chart.

I'd like to thank the Academy...

I'd like to thank the Academy....no, wait... to thank my awesome blog supporters, my friends and family, God, my obgyns, clomid, all the websites, books, and message boards relating to ttc and pregnancy symptoms, and last but not least my wonderful husband. Without all of your support, I would not have been able to get pregnant or have the support I needed to get here intact. Yes, you read that correctly, I am pregnant!!!!!!! 6 weeks today.






To my friends in real life (IRL), please keep this an absolute secret for now. Please do not post any cryptic messages on Facebook (I say this because I am guilty of having done this), only private communication will do. It is amazing how quickly good news spreads. When we got engaged, people I hadn't spoken to in awhile knew within a few days! We told my husband's family at 4 weeks out of necessity, because of the ski trip. We then told my parents because his parents knew. I like to keep things fair and balanced. Then the rest of the world will know around the end of the first trimester, I suppose. You guys are quite special to know this privileged information so early on, but I had to update you!

Highlighted in purple are items I consider necessary for me to get pregnant.

Things I did this month:
whole dairy
organic milk, eggs, and spinach
pre-natal
Vitamin D3
clomid 50mg CD 3-7
prayer
ate pineapple around and after ovulation
didn't feel like I needed to use pre-seed
refused to get my hopes up during the 2WW
no Fertilaid

Things I did differently this month:
ate meat
perfect BD timing, three days in a row (two days before and day of ovulation),
started temping
wore "Get Lucky!" temporary tattoo with 4 leaf clover on my bikini area (comes with OPK's from early-pregnancy-tests.com)
did yoga, exercise or relaxation daily

Things that would happen the month I get pregnant, of course:
went on a ski trip
purchased Fertility Friend VIP status for 90 days
still bought next month's clomid just in case
told one family member about this blog (Hey, girl!)

Speaking of blogs, I will probably start a new Pregnancy blog at some point. I want to keep my TTC blog private/anonymous, and will probably return to use it in the future. I'll post here to let you know when the new blog is up. I totally understand if you don't want to Follow the pregnancy blog, but if you do, I would love to have your company there too! I'll still be Following you ttc'ers and rooting you on! And as we all know, especially as it is still so early in the pregnancy, I could easily end up right back here anytime. Stay tuned for a post on BFP 2WW symptoms. I'm still thinking of all you ttc'ers and wishing you the best! Hang in there, girls!!

Jane, you were right, that was my month!